Poems on Death and Departure

May

snow falls from the tips of my fingers to the street below
all that’s missing is you. my addiction is gone.
i’m on the phone with a friend from argentina
i wish i knew when she’s coming home for good
i sit on the stairs and talk too loud
to let the world know we’re ok
laugh too loud

there’s a sign overhead that says ‘no loitering’
and your voice left the phone hours ago
and i can feel the moment coming
and i can see it in the air
then it’s over….over.
and snow falls from the tips of my fingers to the street below
i am missing you so long

Transition

I don’t know what you say
translation secondhand
you stagger among us
hollow black eyes
our forum on you
big knife, little pills, cutting board
you don’t care
new cabinets, new scalp, new blood
you don’t care
you want fresh water but can’t find it
you want fresh water but none is there
cap, fucking cap where is it
little white pills
white circle in a magazine
white child eyes
fucking cap
you fucking bastard but I would
stand on the ceiling to see you smile
I would stand on the ceiling just for a smile

I don’t know what you say
I don’t know what it’s like
to look in the mirror and say, “I’m gone.”
fucking bastard but I’m glad
you know who I am
I’m just glad you know who I am
fucking bastard
you don’t care why do I
you don’t care why do I
you don’t care why do I
you don’t care why do I
glad, I guess I’m glad you know
who I am

Untitled

well words have to be said don’t they
tears have to be shed don’t they
fucking face of the sphinx is crumbling
so why are they on their cell phones
ears have to be fed
words have to be said don’t they

her mind is being tug o’ warred
landmines dot her landscape and
she blows them up with words
she blows them up with words

well there you are staring stupid
there you are mouth twisting
twisting around them tightly
squeezing shut
the doors

there you are bursting outside in
choking gasping dying
still you sputter
well words have to be said don’t they