How to Make Gross Food for Halloween

If you listen to a group of parents talking, one topic that will come up is the picky eater. Parents will complain that their kids won’t eat vegetables, won’t eat any meat but chicken nuggets, won’t eat anything but cereal bars for breakfast. Turn to gross food for help! And since Halloween is right around the corner, these make great gross Halloween party foods, too.

How about some Strained Eyeballs?
This requires 6 hardboiled eggs,
6 ounces whipped cream cheese,
7 green olives with pimientos,
and a little red food coloring.
Peel eggs and cut in half lengthwise. Remove the yolks. Fill the holes with cream cheese. Press an olive into each cream cheese eyeball, pimiento facing up, for a scary green iris and startling red pupil! For a final disgusting touch touch, dip the tip of a toothpick in red food coloring and draw broken blood vessels in the cream cheese.
See, your kids will love eating eggs!

So your kids don’t like vegetables? See if they will eat this “Hairball Salad”!
Take 1 large ripe avocado,
2 cups of alfalfa sprouts,
6 grated whole carrots (not the baby ones)
Cut the avocado in half and scoop the pit out. Dip avocado out of the shell and mash sprouts and avocado together. Leave some lumps, it’s grosser that way. Divide the grated carrot among four salad dishes and dip the avocado mixture into hairball lumps onto the bed of grated carrots. For a disgusting dressing, drizzle on Italian dressing for “saliva-covered hairballs”.

Oozing Pimples
Core a couple dozen cherry tomatoes. Drain excess tomato juice. Fill the holes in tomatoes with cream cheese. When you squeeze each pimple a bit, arrange on a platter for a gross appetizer.

Boogers (If you have a toddler, you might not need this recipe, but that’s another story.)
Melt 8 ounces Cheese Whiz in the microwave and allow to cool slightly. Carefully stir in three or four drops of green food coloring just enough to turn the cheese into an appetizing shade of snot green. Dip and twist a pretzel stick into the cheese, wait twenty seconds, and dip again to form boogers. Set the boogered pretzel sticks onto wax paper to cool. Honestly, this one is gross just typing it. You might want your elementary aged child to help you make these so you don’t get sick yourself.

Top this gross food off with a drink. How about some Swamp Water? Mix a can of frozen lemonade prepared according to directions, 2 liters of Seven-Up, and a half gallon of Rainbow sherbert, slightly melted. This mixture will turn a nicely disgusting grayish-brown. For a final touch, float some green and yellow after dinner mints on top of the scummy water.

These gross food ideas should liven up your Halloween party or enliven a family dinner. And for a change, you will be the one saying, “EWWWWW, gross!”