Pack Rats and Clutter: A Clean-Up Solution

If you are like me, you have accumulated more stuff than you actually need, and dust bunnies are holding marches in the corners of your closet space, waiting for an opportunity to strike hard. I have items that I hold dear to me from my childhood and bags upon bags of “winnings” from pointless claw machines found at your local Target Superstore. (The key to winning those, by the way, is to drag the claw before dropping it, loosening stuffed novelty plushes and causing them to fall into the hole.) The latter is mainly due to my girlfriend, who has made the house look more like a Toys ‘R Us toy store than a starter home for two. Never will I tell her that we need to cut down on these items, since I have the “Pack Rat Gene” installed somewhere in my DNA as well. The great question is, once the stuffed animals and dust bunnies have signed a declaration of war and have exploded out of closets to take over the rest of the house, “What should stay and what should go?” What does one do with all of the items that have been given the “thumbs down”?

Storage? For the unstoppable Pack Rat, the monthly renting of a storage facility of 10′ by 10′ can run around $170 a month! Naturally, this will vary by state as well as the size of the unit. To me, this sounds slightly excessive for items that, chances are, you really do not need. Therefore, unless you like throwing money away, take heart with these other solutions:

First, make a mental checklist of 3 different itemized categories: one group of things you will definitely keep, one that you can profit from, and one that really nobody in their right mind wants for any reason: The Trash Pile. “The Keepers” should include such items that have a special place in your heart, bring back fond memories, and naturally items that you still currently use. Pack Rats take notice: Don’t make room by tossing out the blender and then realize you need it to make a mud slide! Keepsakes should be shelved or stored in closets. As a grown man, I have great difficulty in parting with items that bring back fond childhood memories. Therefore, I don’t! I am a stern believer that reminiscing about the past is part of a healthy mind, and keeping some childhood memories is actually a good thing. The emphasis is on “some” though.

Next, cast a critical eye on items you don’t need, but might serve a purpose for others. That George Foreman Grill? The Food Processor or extra set of unopened dinner plates? Never-used Brandy glasses that were given to you for Christmas four years ago? It’s time to gather all of these items and sell them! Don’t fool yourself by saying, “Oh, I might use these next Christmas,” because chances are, you said that the last time you attempted clean-up. And if they were important, you would have discovered them by now. Your cousin had no idea what to get you when she purchased that novelty candle-set anyway. She only sees you once a year! With the power of the internet, the saying “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure” not only rings true across the entire nation, but practically the whole world! E-Bay your items and see what kind of bid you can get on stuff you weren’t using anyway. Do your homework beforehand by looking up similar prices on E-Bay and other auction e-tailers.

If you want to get rid of excessive clutter the “old school way,” hold a garage sale. Put an ad in the Pennysavers, be specific about some of the eye-catching items you will be offering, and even serve some light refreshments on the Saturday and Sunday morning that people come over. If it is legal, put out signs around street corners advertising your sale to catch passer-byes. Be prepared to negotiate, particularly if you see that some of your items are not moving. However, don’t go too low in price; chances are, you can get a better bid on E-bay.

Lastly, if you still have items in the “sell” category and nobody seems to be nibbling on the bait, go to your local Goodwill store and make a charitable donation. The items you present to them can be used as a tax deduction as long as you hold on to the paperwork.

And now the category that Pack Rats find to be most difficult. Time to suck it up; this can be one of the most difficult parts of being a mature, grown-up. OK…maybe that is excessive. Parenting is probably far more difficult. However, some of the things you discover during clean-up have to go in category #3: Garbage. The rule of thumb states: if you haven’t used it for a year, it is trash applies here and now. Say “adios” to the clutter like Christmas Cards from five years ago (Especially from that once-a-year cousin who doesn’t seem to buy anything you like), as well as your “Puppy’s and cutesy-poo animals” Calendar from 1995. Trust me, 1995 will not be coming back anytime soon. Dispose of it. Some things will be difficult to part with, but your house might be busting at the seams and this can be an opportunity to make room for more valuable accessories. Bite the bullet and just do it. Be careful, however, not to dispose of tax information that is less than six years old. You never know when the IRS may pull a fast one and attempt to audit you!

Now that your house is clean and under control, get yourself that lava lamp you’ve always wanted and that poker table for when your friends come over. Just make sure that these new purchases don’t start the cycling of Pack-Ratting all over again!