Bride to Bridesmaids: You’re All on Diets!!

Recently, I watched one of my favorite shows on the WE network. The program is called Bridezillas, and it follows the ups and downs of stressed out brides planning their weddings. While watching this one particular episode, I was left in a quandry. As all the brides were making atrocious demands on their family and friends, the likes of hair requierments, make-up looks and shoe heights, this one bride really took the cake. She insisted on having all her bridesmaids lose weight for her upcoming wedding.

As someone who knows the struggle of weight loss, I couldn’t believe my ears! Is society’s demand on how a woman should look not enough of a pressure? The insults coming close to home hurt more than a strangers’ comments. Shouldn’t family and friends be even a little sympathetic towards the difficulty of being a heavier person in a world that values thinness? Doesn’t the uncomfortable way you feel about yourself sometimes weigh in at all? Bigger people have feelings, too! How dare she dictate how you need to look! What business is it of hers, anyway! The nerve!

Then I stepped back and thought…wait a minute…I see her point.

Now hear me out, please! It IS the bride’s special day. Of course, she would want to have everything done to live up to her dream wedding. In a perfect world, the bride would be able to look back at the pictures of her union and see everyone she loves in the best light. Let’s face facts, people. A chubby person rarely looks better than a thinner one, especially when wearing the same dress. As a bridesmaid, it’s already expected that the bride will tell you what dress to wear, what shoes, what hair style…how much of a leap is it really to suggest the weight you ought to be? Sure, one could mention the health risks involved. ‘You’ll feel better, be healthier, blah, blah, blah.’ But what the ‘good intentioned’ person really means to say is that you’ll look better. Who doesn’t want that?

This goes without mentioning the truly evil people who shriek at the sight of a little pudge. ‘She’ll ruin MY pictures!’ I wonder how many people have been left out of the bridal party because of a weight issue. Or how many have turned down an invite because of one. Does the bride really have a right to say what she feels, even at the risk of hurting one’s feelings? Is there a way to subtly bring up the subject? Has anyone ever been in this situation? I’d love to hear your thoughts.