Employers Emphasize Appearance in the New York City Job Market

It had been a long-time, girlhood dream of mine to move to Manhattan. Despite the cynicism that comes with aging, I couldn’t shake naive faith that my life would begin here- don’t ask me what it would begin to do, but apparently I felt that whatever it was wasn’t going to start in Seattle. So I abandoned a pleasant and easy life in the Emerald city, and came to New York, In the spirit of the rashness of the move, I had only a short check list of things to do: find an apartment, find a job, begin life.

I’m not going to get into apartment hunting in this city. That is a story best left to all those nights I spent in the guest bedroom of a friend’s house in New Jersey, swearing violently into my pillow every time that I commuted in to see an apartment that ended up not having a bathroom and already had four applications on it.

What I want to talk about is jobs.

Now job hunting is no piece of cake, no matter where you are. I was in college in Seattle, so only had your basic restaurant job. I now wanted something more daytime, and now that I wielded a college degree, (and the same naivety that landed me in this mess in the first place,) I foolishly thought that finding a job wouldn’t be that tough. Something entry level with potential for the future. I wanted to work by day, and write the Great American Novel by night, like a kind of geeky, more selfish version of Batman.

I don’t think I am anything special, but I ask you: who the hell do some of these employers think that they are? Either they pay about enough to cover your toiletry needs for the month, or they ask nothing less than Tyra Banks with a Harvard degree. I am fairly smart (it doesn’t always show in my decision making, but I am,) and I am not Quasimodo. But I read some of these low wage job descriptions, and I almost don’t even want to bother applying for a decent job. Even though I am not entirely unaware that being good-looking can get you certain advantages in life, I was shocked by how unabashed New Yorkers are in emphasizing it- not to “get you something extra,” but as a minimal expectation.

One job asked for a “sexatary:” oh come on, you know what that is, the “leggy type with short skirts and a flirtatious, engaging manner to handle clients.” Another more primly requests a “model type” with the “charm of Audrey Hepburn.” Is that reasonable? Especially for a lousy nine dollars an hour, in a city where the average apartment costs well over one thousand dollars per month? If I’m a model type with the charm of Audrey Hepburn, I would hope to making well over that – and not working as an assistant. One job description asked for someone fluent in Hungarian and Russian, with a college degree, (preferably a MA,) proficient in computer programs, 5+ years of related work experience, and the ability to micromanage from 8-6 with occasional weekends…for the whopping salary of $23,000/year. No benefits. Oh, and don’t forget, “poised and extremely polished appearance mandatory.” Obviously, such skills are needed to help run the front desk at a two star midtown spa.

I meet maybe one of those qualifications. I also made more than that waiting tables.

I see a lot of ugly people in this city. I’m thinking about asking them where they work, and whether they have to commute in from Ohio or whatever in order to make ends meet. I’m sure that in Seattle attractiveness was definitely taken into consideration. But not so openly, unless you were applying to be a pole dancer or whatever. I wanted to immerse myself in real life as soon as possible, but I now see that I might be too mediocre looking for it. I might have to opt for grad school instead.