Feeling Pain

I feel a pain
deep inside of me
it grows with angst.

I can feel it welling
the feeling inside me
it waits to kill what’s left of my life.

What’s left of life itself
the rest inside me.

That killer instinct
waits in murky waters
for the rest of my soul
to come inside.

The way it was meant to be
for you and me.

I don’t get it anymore
I probably never did
this feeling that we had.

It’s gone now, that’s how I know
we had it before.
that I’m missing it now.

I miss the feeling
of you against me
in that similar fashion
of mutual admiration.

The love of each other
we used to have.
It’s gone in one instant.

The love we used to have
it’s gone just like that.
It will never come back again.

Blown away
and thrown wherever.

To be discarded amongst the angst.

It wells inside my body.

I wish I never did it
a feeling of angst formed from care.

My love for you is all important
and influenced throughout all of this.

I’m afraid to go to sleep because I’m afraid to wake up alone