Fetish 101

Fetishes can seem like the sexual underbelly of our lives. But even in a healthy and monogamous relationship, satisfying a fetish can be extremely rewarding, both for the person with the fetish and his or her partner. (You can find a great definition of what, exactly, a fetish is by visiting drsusanblock.com or wikipedia.org.)

Chances are, though, you know enough about what a fetish is, but are more specifically concerned with one fetish in particular – your own or that of your lover. The first thing to remember is not to be afraid of the fetish (provided, of course, that it is not inherently dangerous or illegal in and of itself).

Most of the fetishes I know of were formed in childhood, adolescence, or young adulthood. One friend confides that she saw a (female) cousin of hers spanked, a cousin on whom she had a crush, and ever since then, spanking – either being spanked by someone or spanking someone else – excites her. Another friend, as a youngster, spied a scout leader bending over the trunk of her car, and developed a fetish for what can now be referred to as the ‘den mother’ role play. (Note, too, that although these fantasies were formed at an early age, neither person is interested in children whatsoever, nor were they formed by any inappropriate contact between adults and children. That kind of inappropriate interest is not part of our discussion here. If someone approaches you with that ‘fetish’ – please, pick up the phone and contact authorities! What we are discussing here is the healthy adult expression of personal experiences.)

Gratefully, the Internet makes it relatively easy to gather the needed ingredients for fetish satisfaction. For uniforms of all types, start with an auction site, like eBay.com. There you will find the perfect outfit for most costume or uniform-related fetishes, including scouting, cheerleading, military, law enforcement, and a host of other accoutrements. Somewhere, someone is getting rid of a scouting or military uniform they no longer need – and you’re about to excite your partner with an amazing outfit for a reasonable cost!

If your fetish paraphernalia requires something a bit more esoteric, you’ll want to check out a site like www.aswgt.com (Adam and Gillian’s Sensual Whips and Toys) or www.affections.com, which offer a full complement of handcuffs, ankle cuffs, masks, whips, and other accessories.

Of course, by their very nature, fetishes are highly personal. For some people, simply admiring their lovers’ feet or lower legs is extremely sexy, so rather than searching online for something a bit odd, it might simply be a matter of finding just the right toenail polish or other accessory, as you would at footsiesbiz.com.

Most of all, relax and have fun with it. This fetish is the kinky, personal side to your lover, as they have been conditioned to be turned on by this particular object or activity. Enjoy it, in all of its twisted glory. Treat it with a sense of joy and play, and you will find that you, too, enjoy the fetish.