Guide to Annual Halloween Activities in St. Louis

At a certain age, you’re just too old to be trick or treating. You’ll start to notice when Wal-Mart doesn’t carry as many costumes in your size, and the neighbors start to look at you weird.

But hey, that doesn’t mean that Halloween should be any less of a holiday. In fact, around St. Louis, Missouri, there’s enough going on to put a smile on any witch or warlock’s face once a year. Halloween is one of those holidays that the home of the Cardinals does right, and in a big way.

First of all, if you do have kids, you can have a blast at Six Flags (or throw ’em there, if they’re old enough, while you check out something else), where the annual FrightFest combines stomach-turning rides with a fun haunted house atmosphere. Six Flags goes all out the way only a multimilliondollar corporate entity can, but be warned – the crowds can be as scary as some of the attractions. Nevertheless, it’s fun for kids and pretty good time for adults, too.

If you’re in for a little haunted house action (and who isn’t), there are some fantastic ones in St. Louis. Check out the Darkness, the area’s premier thrill joint, which has nothing to do with the glam-rock band The Darkness, except that both use large quantities of makeup to scare the hell out of small children. Expect zombie priests, ghosts, and the occasional drunk guy attacking the actors.

And by the way, The Darkness is a part of Scarefest, an unimaginatively named but extremely well done group of haunted houses (and one secret government alien containment facility) that allow you to buy one universal ticket that works with any and all of them. There are no slackers here-each haunted house is put together over the course of the year and feature state of the art effects and fantastically frightening actors. Any one of these houses can ruin whatever pair of pants you visit them in, and each one receives fantastic reviews every year from publications such as the St. Louis Post Dispatch and websites such as AOL.com. Each is imaginative, completely different from the last, and unique from the plague of ho-hum haunted houses that inevitably crop up every year.

If you’re like me, these rides & funhouses are a good time, but you’re looking for something a little more genuine, a bit more frightening. What’s better than a real ghost?

St. Louis is one of the most haunted places in America, and if you’re looking for some one-on-one contact with the dead, the city will provide. Try the Lemp Mansion, for instance, where you can take a guided tour of one of the creepiest houses this side of the Neverland Ranch.

The legend is that a wealthy beer tycoon slowly lost his fortune and his sanity in the old house, eventually leading to his suicide-and the suicide of three other family members, as time went on. There are regular tours, a dining room, and ghosts that make occasional appearances. On top of that, there’s a big party every Halloween with three live bands and that other form of “spirits.” Tickets cost around $40-50, but it’s a blast to party at a real haunted mansion.

And as long as you’re in the mood for getting creeped out, stop by the old Alexian Brothers hospital. Everyone knows that The Exorcist was one of the creepiest movies of all times, but it’s not common knowledge that the inspiration for the book and movie came from a real life case in St. Louis. In 1949, a family brought their child to the Alexian hospital in hopes of curing his puzzling condition, which included such supernatural symptoms as his bed shaking uncontrollably for no reason and inexplicable scratching sounds in the walls of his bedroom. Jesuit priests performed an exorcism which eventually garnered national attention, being one of the only recorded modern exorcisms in existence. The wing of the hospital where the exorcism was performed has since been demolished and rebuilt, but it’s still worth a stop if you’ve got the guts. Be warned; alot of professional ghost hunters won’t even touch the place. The aura is said to be too strong, if, of course, you believe in that sort of thing.

You really can’t pick a better city for Halloween than St. Louis – whether you prefer theme parks, parties, or genuinely ghostly attractions, there’s a fantastic time lurking somewhere in the cobwebs. Just remember to play it safe: keep a designated driver, know where you’re going, and don’t pick up any pale hitchhikers that keep disappearing on the side of the road.