Gunfire in My Kitchen

One quiet evening many years ago, I decided to sit down at my desk and answer some letters from friends and family. Where was e-mail back then?! Anyway, my husband was watching some Sci-Fi program in the living room and I headed to the desk in the bedroom to write.

Our apartment wasn’t in the best area of town, but there was never anything too bad going on there and for the most part it was quiet. I was almost finished with my first letter when all of a sudden I thought I heard gunfire and it really sounded like it was in my kitchen. At the same time, my husband yelled from the living room to get down as he safely made his way to me. We huddled there, scared, and wondering what was going on and why in our kitchen? Soon the gunfire stopped and we listened for other noises…voices, anything…there was nothing but silence and an awful smell.

My husband whispered for me to stay there while he went out to check. My heart was still in my throat and I really didn’t want him to go out there. I thought we should just hurry out a window and run…but the windows in this apartment didn’t always want to open easily and we didn’t want to draw any attention as to what room we were in.

All of a sudden I heard my husband break into uncontrollable laughter. I had never heard him laugh like that ever before. I was still too scared to move and he was walking back to where I was. He was laughing so hard that he couldn’t catch his breath and threw himself on the bed trying to stifle himself. With that, there was a knock on our door and it was the neighbors. They wanted to check on us because they heard all of the commotion. My husband was trying to tell them we’re OK, but he was still laughing and not making much sense. I finally calmed down and asked him what was so darn funny. He put his arm around me and walked me out to the kitchen where I saw such an awful mess, not to mention the smell that could knock you over.

Let me just tell you that whenever you are making hard boiled eggs, please remember you are doing so because once all of the water cooks out and the pot starts burning, those eggs will explode! Not only that, but they are very hard to clean off of the walls, stove, ceiling, cabinets, and any other areas they managed to reach during the explosions. Don’t be surprised if the cops show up if you have neighbors because they will also think the noise is gunfire. It’s been 30 years since that happened and nobody will let me forget it especially if there is a picnic or something coming up and I bring the deviled eggs…it starts the story telling all over again!