Helping Your Child Follow Directions
Establish rules for following directions, such as having your child listen closely when directions are being given. These rules should be consistent and followed by everyone in the household, and talked about often.
Communicate in a loving, patient and understanding manner.
Let your child know that it is okay to ask that directions be repeated, and encourage them to ask questions about directions that they do not fully understand.
Reward your child for following directions, and praise them. Make sure you offer positive encouragement and let them know that they are doing a good job.
Assist your child in performing responsibilities and gradually require your child to independently assume more responsibility as he/she demonstrates success and confidence.
Make sure that the responsibilities given to your child are age-appropriate for your child, and meet the level of your child’s ability and development.
Sit down with your child and discuss a list of chores that he/she would like to do. Letting your child have some say in the decision making makes it seem less like work and more like fun.
Establish a certain time of day for your child to take care of their responsibilities. If your child feeds the dog at 8 a.m. every morning, they develop a routine and are less likely to forget their chores.
Do not punish your child for forgetting on occasion, or for accidents that interfere with following direction.
Make certain to give directions in a very simple manner and be specific as to what your child will be doing. This will improve your child’s understanding and minimize confusion.
Do not give directions to your child from another room. Make sure that you are speaking face to face so that you are sure to have your child’s complete undivided attention.
Make sure that your child is paying attention to you when you are telling him/her to do something. Have your child repeat back instructions so that you are certain they understand.
Try not to criticize your child. When correcting your child, be honest, yet supportive. Never cause your child to feel bad about himself/herself.
Make certain that you child sees the relationship between his/her behavior and the consequences which may follow. A good example may be that if they do not bring in their book from outside, the rain may damage it.
Allow natural consequences to occur due to your child’s failing to follow directions, such as the rain damaging the book.
Along with a directive, provide an incentive statement, for example, if your child thoroughly cleans their room, they may have friends over tomorrow.
In order to help your child follow directions and focus on the directions you are trying to give, reduce distractions. This could be as simple as turning down the radio or turning the television off.
Do not give your child directions to follow with more than two or three steps. Directions that involve several steps can be confusing and cause your child to have difficulty following them.
Deliver directions in a supportive rather than a threatening manner.
Give your child a special responsibility such as setting the table or answering the phone.
Carefully consider your child’s age and experience when giving directions to follow.
Show your child the proper way to do certain tasks. If you tell your child to feed the dog, they may just pour the whole bag in the bowl! You should go with your child and show exactly how you want it done. “See, Billy, Fido needs two cups of dog food everyday.”
When your child does not follow a direction, explain exactly what he/she did wrong, and what should have been done and why.
And finally, try to remember that kids are kids. Everyone learns responsibility in different ways, on different levels and at different times. Each child is different and you should never compare the accomplishments and capabilities of your child to that of another. Remember to always parent sensibly with love and understanding. Always support your child and never forget to reward good behavior.
