How to Start and Run a Book Club Using the Internet
I belong to a lesbian book club for women in their fifties and sixties. The book club has been going strong for about two years now. The book club was started by a physician I’ll call Pauline. This is how she started the book club and this is how it runs.
One day I got a letter from match.com from a woman who asked if I would be interested in joining a book club. I was a member of the women looking for women section of match.com. I wrote back saying I was interested and that I was also interested in meeting Pauline-maybe for coffee? Pauline ignored the request for a date and proceeded with her plans for a book club.
After a couple of months, she sent an e-mail listing three books we could vote on for our first meeting. The vote was overwhelmingly for “Intertwined Lives,” the story of the relationship between anthropologists Margaret Mead and Ruth Bennett. Pauline e-mailed the results and set the date, time and place.
On a nice sunny day, the members of the club met for the first time at Pauline’s home in the Hollywood Hills. A group of about twelve strangers, most a bit nervous, met for the first time. We introduced ourselves and soon found out that we all had one thing in common: we all disliked the book, an academic, plodding study of a famous romance. After the book was thoroughly trashed, there was a discussion/argument on what sorts of books we would read. Pauline wanted to read classic novel every 5 or 6 meetings or so. This was readily agreed to. The main argument was about whether we should only read books by women, books by or about lesbians, or books by and about anyone or anything. The group finally agreed that we would read literary books only and not take up self-help, for example. Finally it was decided we would read books by men and women, straight and gay. Then we went out to eat.
The book club continues to meet once every month. Some members drive as much as fifty miles to attend. People bring nibblies and we always go to a restaurant after the book discussion. Friendships have formed and we have had one breakup but no romances.
You don’t have to be a lesbian to use the Internet to form a book club. You could join a personals service and, if you are a woman, sign in as a man looking for a woman. Look for women who list reading as one of their interests, are in your area, and are roughly in your age group. Then start e-mailing. This may take some time. It took Pauline several months. You may think that the women on a personals site are only looking for a mate but in this day of impersonal cities, most people could also use a few more friends and are often eager for a chance to make some.
Although it has worked out well for Pauline to hold the meetings at her home, this is not without risks and I would opt for neutral territory. Try your local library, for example. Then, after you know the people, meetings could be held in member’s homes. It is important to have a moderator to move things along and to keep people on task. The kind of book the group is going to read needs to be decided on during the first meeting or there will be continued conflict. If people don’t bring snacks on their own, ask them to. Food is important. Going out to a restaurant is good because it gives people a chance to chat and get to know each other.
Pauline e-mails members with the book choice two or three days after the group has met and then sends out a reminder a few days before the next meeting.
