Internet Dating Inevitabilities

I know people who met on the Internet and have become happily married for years; and I know other people who have known each other since grade school who didn’t stay married but a few months. This observation brings to mind a line in one of my favorite films, which to paraphrase, says something like, “In marriage, happiness is only a matter of chance. If one is to spend one’s life with someone, it is best to know as little as possible about his defects. One will find them out soon enough.” The thought occurs to me that this must be the mantra of Internet dating sites.

Although these are only personal observations, and are not intended to convey anyone’s experiences other than my own, I wonder if one or more of these thoughts has at sometime, or will ever cross your mind. Maybe not. Either way, here’s my list of of thoughts and oddities that I’ve noticed and wanted to share.

1. Internet dating is a crap shoot. You win some, you lose more. I’s kind of fun, but the odds are definitely not in your favor.

2. On the Internet, even Barney Rubble can make himself out to be The Rock and Minnie Mouse can make herself into Minnie Driver. (Or insert your own idea of a relatively to exceptionally attractive person.)

3. The Internet is flooded with recent photos actually taken years BEFORE the digital media age. (Sure, I’ve done it too, but I really do look like that. 🙂

4. We will tell our life stories in intimate detail to virtual strangers before we even meet. (Inhibitions to the wind!)

5. On the Internet, we discover talents and interests we never knew we had until we start building a profile. (I play racquetball and read voraciously.)

6. On the Internet,we actually expect people to be honest about their health, height, hygiene, home life, and personal habits just because they say so. (As in, If it’s on the Internet, it must be true. Didn’t they say the same thing about TV a while back? Go figure.)

7. On the Internet, men are instantly 2-5 inches taller, and women instantly weigh 10-20 pounds less than in person. (Or in my case, 25.)

8. In an initial face-to-face meeting, chemisty created/discovered on the Internet can go either way: Evaporate in thin air like rubbing alcohol or ignite like spontaneous combustion. (And yes, I still believe in chemistry.)

9. On the Internet, people will choose to pay membership fees for access to a large pool of potential “matches” who disappoint us. (When we used to settle for getting the same results for free.)

10. Internet dating inexplicably inspires the spirit of “try, try, again”, no matter how many times “at first you don’t succeed”. (Tenacity is still a good thing, right?)

If you can honestly say that not even one of these has happened to you during your online dating experience, then it’s highly likely that you’re the one who’s done it to someone else.