Is Your Man Cheating at Work?
To ensure your guy is doing his job rather than his coffee-break buddy, follow these warning signs:
(1) Listen when he talks about Work! Ask Questions
If he can’t talk to you about the workplace highs and lows, he may open up to someone who understands all the pressure he’s under. “The more you know, the more he can share with you and the less likely he’ll be to confide in his attractive coworker,
To come across as genuinely interested ask specific questions that address how he handled certain tasks or dealt with a difficult higher-up. Otherwise, it’s like pulling teeth. “If you simply ask him how work is or what’s up, he’ll say, ‘It’s fine’ or ‘Nothing,'” says Alon Gratch, Ph.D., author of If Men Could Talk. “But when you ask targeted questions, it’s easier to get him talking.”
With some insight, you’ll also be able to determine if his late nights make sense or seem suspicious. Is he working on a project that would require him to work more hours or send him out of town for a long weekend? If he knows that you know what he’s up to, it’s harder for him to pull late nights or grab drinks with a cute coworker without any explanation.
(2) Be a Presence
Another cheat-proof-him strategy: Make sure everyone at his job knows he has a woman. Be enthusiastic about joining him for work gatherings, whether it’s the company party, after-work beers or his coworker’s birthday. Otherwise, a potential rival will assume she can steal your man because she doesn’t take your commitment seriously. In her mind, if the relationship is legit, you’d be there.
By making your presence known, you’re marking your turf as well. “It humanizes you and gives you a face,” says Weil. “Not only will she realize you’re a real part of his life, but it will also make her feel guilty about trying to get it on with your guy once she’s socialized with you. Also, Occasionally surprise him at work by taking him to lunch or just to stop by, Pay attention to his reaction and the reactions of others. Does he get that light in his eyes when he sees you?
(3) Identify the Biggest Threat
You may think that blond bombshell at the front desk has Man Stealer written all over her face, but the chick you least expect could be the real danger to your relationship. “She could simply have some quality that plays to your man’s weaknesses or boosts his ego,” says Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., author of Loving in Flow.
Women working on long-term projects with him or who have cell-phone or pager access to him during off-hours,” “Also, pay attention when a coworker invites him to nonwork functions, especially if he goes without you.” That being said, try not to be paranoid about every woman that crosses his path – just keep your eyes open.
Once you identify the potential co-worker, Kill her with kindness and don’t show any signs of weakness, “If you are uncomfortable, rude or possessive when you see her complimenting your man or laughing at an inside joke, she’ll pick up on your insecurity,” Instead pay attention to the way your man reacts to her, body language. Does he get uncomfortable? Does he lack the normal affection he usually would give you?
Don’t get upset at your man for someone else’s bad intentions. Instead, look at it if the roles are reversed. Just because someone has a crush on you doesnt mean you will react to it. Take it as flattery. she might use to screw you over is making comments to him like “Aren’t you annoyed that she checks up on you all the time?” Stay cool and confident, and she’ll have no ammo to use against you. Understand that Jealousy and insecurity is not attractive. He needs to know you are a confident and secure with who you are.
(3) Stay on His Mind 24-7
Unfortunately, if your guy travels a lot for business, you have a whole other set of concerns. “People are more likely to be unfaithful out of their normal surroundings,. “Loneliness plays a part, but also, the sex is more anonymous, so there’s less chance of getting caught.” In other words, they cheat just because they can.
To keep him from straying while on the road, send him off feeling fantastic about your relationship.. Avoid getting into any last-minute fights or disagreements; he’ll leave with a bad image of you and a “screw her” attitude. “That last, unflattering image might be the one that comes to mind when someone seductive enters the picture,” So he won’t feel as guilty for cheating.
While your guy’s away, agree to chat once every day or so (you might even want to engage in some phone sex to get him
aching for you). When he knows he’s going to be touching base, even if it’s just to say good night, it will reinforce his sense of responsibility – and commitment – to you.
Seventy-five percent of human-resource professionals and 59 percent of employes said that their organization had no formal policy on office romances.
Source: Survey by the Society for Human Resource Management
