Messages About Sex and Violence in the Buffy/Spike Relationship on Buffy the Vampire Slayer
I contend that the message of this relationship to young viewers is a dangerous one. The ambivalent nature of the Buffy/Spike relationship and the ambiguity or complete absence of consequences for unacceptable actions is problematic. The relationship is marked by psychological and emotional abuse and brutal physical violence, culminating in the sixth season episode, “Seeing Red,” in which Spike attempts to force Buffy to return his unrequited feelings by trying to rape her. Rather than dealing with the attack in a serious and respectful manner worthy of such an issue as rape, the show instead shows Spike leave on a quest to regain his “soul” or conscience, with no further interactions between the characters for the rest of the season. There are no apparent consequences for Spike’s abusive treatment of the woman he professes to “love”, Buffy. By the time he returns in Season 7, with the exception of one incident where Buffy flinches at his touch (Episode 7.2, “Beneath You”), all is forgiven because he has “shown [her] his penance” (Episode 7.8, “Sleeper”) – in spite of the fact that he never even apologized to her. From that point on, they are intimate friends. This story line tells viewers that any way a man chooses to treat a woman is acceptable, as long as he is apologetic afterward and promises never to hurt her again. This is a common tactic of the abuser in relationships marked by domestic violence. Not all viewers of the series read the relationship this way, and I will present three points of view illustrating the most common audience receptions of the Buffy/Spike relationship, including those of three writers on the Mutant Enemy staff.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer appeared on the WB network from 1997-2001 and on UPN from 2001-2003. Filmed on location throughout Los Angeles, but primarily on its own lot at the FOX studios in Burbank, California, BtVS boasted a large roster of talented writers, including series creator Joss Whedon and writers Jane Espenson and David Fury among many others. Creator Joss Whedon’s production company Mutant Enemy and 20th Century Fox Television produced the series.
appeared on the WB network from 1997-2001 and on UPN from 2001-2003. Filmed on location throughout Los Angeles, but primarily on its own lot at the FOX studios in Burbank, California, boasted a large roster of talented writers, including series creator Joss Whedon and writers Jane Espenson and David Fury among many others. Creator Joss Whedon’s production company Mutant Enemy and 20th Century Fox Television produced the series.
The relationship between Buffy and Spike can roughly be divided into four stages: archenemies (Seasons 2-4), reluctant allies (Seasons 4 & 5), sadomasochistic bedmates (Season 6), and finally close friends (Season 7). Spike’s original role on the show was that of “cool villain” – the funny bad guy every fan loves. Despite the fact that he spent most of his time trying to kill Buffy and her friends during the archenemy stage, the audience adored his English accent, his Billy Idol-esque image, and his witty repartee. In response, the creators of the show decided to make him a series regular in Season 4. To do so, however, Mutant Enemy needed to somehow contain Spike’s monstrous evil – it was inappropriate to have a true villain as a part of the heroine’s group of friends (called “The Scooby Gang” or “The Scoobies.”). To eliminate this difficulty, a paramilitary government organization called “The Initiative” implanted a behavioral modification chip in Spike’s brain that prevented him from doing violence to humans by punishing such behavior with excruciating pain (Episode 4.7, “The Initiative”). From that point on, he could no longer hunt and kill as vampires do to survive, and was forced to work with Buffy and the Scoobies for cash to buy animal blood, smokes and beer.
None of the Scoobies ever truly trust Spike, but over time he becomes integrated with the group and is frequently used as a source of information or brute strength in battle. When Buffy died (temporarily) at the end of Season 5 (Episode 5.22, “The Gift”), Spike took over some of her slaying duties, and also looked after Buffy’s younger sister Dawn (Episode 6.1 & 6.2, “Bargaining”). Earlier in Season 5, Spike decided he was “in love” with Buffy (Episode 5.4, “Out of My Mind”). He had nurtured an obsession with Slayers over his 120-years as a vampire, and killed two of them. (Episode 5.7, “Fool for Love”) His “love” for Buffy appears to be a sort of transference – with the chip in his head, he can no longer kill her, so his obsession becomes sexual and “romantic” instead.
When her friends magically bring Buffy back to life in Season 6, the viewer discovers that she was not suffering in Hell as her friends believed, but was actually in Heaven (Episode 6.7, “Once More, With Feeling”). As a result, Buffy is in extreme emotional pain – she wonders if this world she returned to his actually Hell (Episode 6.2 “Bargaining Part II”). She is depressed and detached from everyone after digging her way out of her own grave, and is too afraid to hurt her friends by telling them the truth about where she was. The only person she feels she can talk to is the only “person” in her group who has also died and come back to “life”: Spike. He takes advantage of her emotional weakness by pursuing her relentlessly in spite of her protests that she hates him. Toward the middle of the season, Spike and Buffy discover that Spike can physically hurt Buffy, but no one else. They engage in a barbaric, vicious battle that culminates in even more vicious sex. This interplay of sex and violence continues throughout the season, which Buffy says she engages in just to feel something (Episode 6.7, “Once More, With Feeling”).
As Buffy recovers her self-worth and desire to live, she realizes that the relationship, and the way she has been using Spike are wrong, and she breaks up with him (Episode 6.15, “As You Were”). Spike is unwilling to accept her rejection, and in Episode 6.19, “Seeing Red,” he attempts to “convince” her by trying to rape her on her bathroom floor, growling, “I’m gonna make you feel it.” She only escapes the assault by kicking him across the room, and spells out in no uncertain terms that his attack demonstrates why she could never love him – he is a monster with no conscience. Finally realizing that this is true, Spike then goes to Africa and engages in a series of trials to regain his soul. His attempt to rape her is mentioned a few times in passing (Episode 6.20, “Villains,” Episode 7.2, “Beneath You,” and Episode 7.6, “Him”), and Spike is still never accepted by Buffy’s friends, but Buffy herself forgives him and takes him back as her confident in Season 7.
Spike and the Spuffy relationship are points of great contention not only in the fan community, but also among the writers. Through the years, writer David Fury, for example, has been quoted a number of times saying that Spike is a villain, and not an acceptable choice as a romantic partner for Buffy. His most infamous comment was posted in 2001 on the largest Buffy fan board, The Bronze (now defunct), in response to a number of fans who were clamoring for a Buffy/Spike relationship. He said, “It is beyond my limited imagination to see a strong, independent, female character end up falling for a murderer who would be killling [sic] innocent people were he not suffering from chip affliction,” and compared fans of the Spuffy relationship to women who write love letters to imprisoned serial killers. After the Episode “Seeing Red” appeared, he was asked if Buffy and Spike would ever “reconcile”. His response: “Never trust your attempted rapist.” (DavidFury.net, 2003). Mr. Fury is renowned in fandom for this dislike of this storyline and its fans.
Writer Jane Espenson, on the other hand, believed differently. When asked in an interview about the Buffy/Spike Relationship, Espenson said that it didn’t “work out” not because Spike was evil, had no soul, and tried to rape Buffy, but because Buffy “finds it so hard to love.” She goes on to say, “I love Spike. I was very worried about the attempted rape…it’s very hard to come back from.” (Candy, 2002.) In another interview, Espenson says that the Buffy/Spike relationship was her favorite storyline on the series: “…my number one has got to be the Buffy and Spike love story. I think that is just a gorgeous story. Spike and Buffy have something so much more complicated [than her relationship with her first love, Angel] that it’s got that romance and all this other stuff on top of it which makes it so interesting for me.” (DiLullo, 2003.) Does “all this other stuff” refer to the violence and attempted rape?
Creator Joss Whedon said, ” [The Buffy/Spike relationship] was something that we on staff have been debating for years, and we figured our ambivalence was exactly what we wanted to project, and we used that on the show. We knew that we couldn’t come back from an attempted rape to a romantic sexual relationship. But what we did want to say was that we could come back to a place of trust between these people. That man could redeem himself… that was the best possible message to get out there.” He went on to warn that rapists shouldn’t be “demonized,” as that makes them look like “monsters,” and absolves them of responsibility for their actions. (Sanderson, 2003).
Given the reported “ambivalence” of the writing staff in regard to the nature of the Buffy/Spike relationship and their apparent dismissal of the seriousness of rape, it is hardly surprising that there was anger, confusion and dissention among fans. The viewpoints expressed in fandom can generally be broken down into two categories: casual viewers and “Spikistas,” hyper-dedicated fans of the character of Spike. The opinions of the former group tend to run fairly close to Mr. Fury’s, and express horror over the attempted rape and disgust over the relationship in general. The latter group’s opinions parallel more with Ms. Espenson’s, with people endeavoring to excuse or deny Spike’s behavior, or blame the incident on Buffy if they address the attempted rape at all.
After the episode “Seeing Red” aired on May 7, 2002, the discussion of the matter at the popular Fan Forum posting board was heated. One viewer called “80sbabygirl” (2002) posted, “Yeah, demons are evil, what more can you expect, but a demon can control his actions. It only confirms why Buffy/Spike should have never been together in the first place – what kind of healthy romantic/sexual relationship can a girl have with a demon? It clearly was a Luke/Laura situation and the whole thing was simply degrading and disgusting. Ugh.” More rare in this group were rational expressions of dismay:
“…we all therefore recognize that the act of forcing sex on someone who is not consenting is Very, Very Bad, regardless of the gender, species, prior history, or moral capacity of either party… I for one … had very little trouble distinguishing between Buffy’s no-meaning-yes several episodes back and her no-meaning-no in this episode well after their breakup [emphasis the author’s]…I need hardly add that if Buffy gets back together with anything in the form of James Marsters [the actor who played Spike], it’s going to send a really disturbing message. That said, what I find confusing about that scene… is whether or not we were supposed to sympathize with Spike. I really hope we’re not, but on the other hand, he’s being portrayed as something approaching a tragic hero… this is another sparkling example of the Buffy writers trying to have it both ways, so as not to alienate the many viewers who have sharply polarized views about Spike’s character and Spike’s relationship with Buffy. “ (Baraita, 2002.)
Other fans, even among Spikistas, expressed confusion about the ambiguous depiction of their favorite character and this relationship. “I’ve always loved Spike, so I’ve had a hard time following the writers… I think they confused alot of viewers by trying to make us see him as a bad guy when they’d done such a good job putting Spike in a favourable light…his character was out of their control – they even made him into a potential rapist to highlight that he was evil and yet launched a ‘Spike Calender [sic]’ at the same time – what were we sposed [sic] to make of that?” (Amelia, 2003). As we saw from Mr. Whedon’s comments, this ambiguity came straight from the writers’ room at Mutant Enemy.
The most vocal and disturbing points of view came from a subsection of Spikistas who expended great energy trying to excuse their hero’s actions, and often blamed the attempted rape (dismissively referred to by this group as “AR”) on Buffy’s previous actions during the season. “I’m surprised that the bathroom scene didn’t happen sooner, to be honest. Buffy was wishy-washy with Spike for a long time. She played mind games and confused him. She was controlling him, and whenever she broke it off with him, it was never for too long. This time, maybe he realized that it really was for good and he panicked. Or maybe he still thought it was another one of her games. In the beginning she always acted like she was disgusted with him, but then had sex with him anyway. That time, when “no” really meant no, he didn’t understand.” (Kelsey, 2005) This is a common attack upon women who are raped – the victim is accused of giving “mixed signals” in the past, so it’s understandable that the rapist was “confused.” Others implied that Buffy “asked for it,” and indeed, deserved it: “[Buffy] used and abused him for MONTHS. I was anmazed [sic] too he went as long as he did emotionally being treated like that before he snapped. No never meant no before. She did confuse the hell out of him…when you take into considering [sic] how Buffy was toying with him I can’t say what happened was completely his fault. She did push him too far. If she hadn’t, I seriously doubt that would have happened.” (jp, 2005.)
I have been an avid fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer since the second season, in 1998. I’ve written dozens of fanfiction stories, ran a popular posting board for fans of the Buffy/Angel relationship from 1999-2003, have attended numerous conferences, and still take a vacation once a year with a small, tightly knit group of girlfriends I made in fandom. I often identify myself as a “Buffy Geek.” My interest in “Spuffy” emerged from the damage I saw its ambiguities do to the show’s meta-narrative of female empowerment. Worse, it effectively destroyed of the camaraderie and social order of fandom by polarizing viewers into camps violently dedicated to pro and anti-Spike and Spuffy stances. In addition, the attempted rape scene brought to the forefront some disturbing viewer attitudes toward women, sexual agency, abuse and violence. Indeed, these attitudes, unrelentingly pro-rapist sentiments and outright ignorance about women’s right to give or withhold consent nearly drove me from viewership and fandom forever.
The academic literature about Spike and the Spuffy relationship primarily reflects the “Spikista” point of view, either ignoring or excusing Spike’s violence against Buffy. Lorna Jowett, for example, in her book Sex and the Slayer: A Gender Primer for the Buffy Fan (2005), extensively examines issues of violence and sex on the show, and sees the attempted rape in “Seeing Red” in a twofold manner. First, she says, it served as a “normalizing” event that brings Buffy back to “innocence” after her dark, self-destructive season-long sexual affair with Spike. Second, it is the impetus for Spike to seek his soul (vampires have no souls, and thus, no conscience) after realizing that what he has done proves Buffy’s point that she could never trust him enough to love him without one.
The interplay of sex and violence is a common theme in vampire literature, of which Buffy the Vampire Slayer can be considered a part. Heinecken (2003) contends that this discussion in regards to the Spuffy relationship becomes one of female sexual expression and desire as “complex and contradictory,” and that fan reactions vary accordingly. She examines the role of fantasy in Spuffy supporters’ reading of the relationship, and their constructed extra-textual justifications for the attempted rape. Heinecken herself says that Buffy’s ending the relationship was a denial of her “sexual agency” in order to bring herself back in line with acceptable sexual mores, implying that she somehow betrayed herself by not continuing her relationship with a monster who tried to rape her.
All in-depth examinations of the attempted rape that I found in the academic literature focus on Spike and that incident’s role in his journey. Claire Fossey, in “Never Hurt the Feelings of a Brutal killer: Spike and the Underground Man” compares Spike to Dostoyevsky’s Underground Man from Notes From the Underground. She says that Spike’s attempt to rape Buffy was not only to be expected, but was necessary on his journey to redemption, and therefore was a positive development.
Ours is a world where 80% of rapes are committed by acquaintances of the victim, less than half of those attacks reported to authorities, and in which many teens express a belief that women in certain situations do not have a right to say “no” to sexual activity (Eschbacher, 2002). Therefore, it is more important than ever to examine mixed messages in popular media such as the Buffy/Spike relationship, and understand what they communicate to younger viewers as to what constitutes a healthy romantic and/or sexual relationship. This is especially true in a popular television show whose creators publicly profess themselves and their program to be progressive and feminist, and who are enlightened, educated people with no excuse for not recognizing their influence on, and responsibility toward, young viewers.
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