My Mossimo Shoulder Bag Helped Me Graduate from College

I have a Mossimo shoulder bag. For years and years, I avoided purchasing one as I do most fad-worthy accessories (though I always seem to fold, making me the lamest person on earth). Shoulder bags in general had a very collegiate feel to them (circa 2000), a very academic appeal that (although I was a college student) I hated with a passion that I usually reserve for things like fat free sour cream. “What’s wrong with the good old backpack,” I would scream, naked in the night. I was lost, but thanks to God, my Mossimo shoulder bag showed me the way.

I can’t speak for other brands of shoulder bags (and I’m certain there are hundreds), but my Mossimo shoulder bag is fantastic. Let me tell you why.

There are two types of scholastic people in this world: heavy book people and knickknack people; I am of the latter faction. The heavy book people might use a shoulder bag (they may even have a Mossimo shoulder bag) but this is foolish and they are fools. If you’re the kind of academic who has a lot of “textbooks” and you’re prone to lugging these said “textbooks” back and forth to the “library”, you’re going to need a bag pack; a big, strong, no frills backpack.

In close to six years of college, I never once went to the library and I bought only 13% of the textbooks that I was supposed to. Frankly, it’s amazing that I graduated. I was weary of buying a shoulder bag (even a Mossimo shoulder bag) because I was scared the mere connotation of being dedicated to academia would some how cut into my social life and/or “image”. Boy was I wrong.

In fact, my Mossimo shoulder bag did wonders for both my social and scholastic lives. Like I said before, I’m a knickknack person. As a child, I liked shopping for school supplies more than going to school (which I also enjoyed more than actually learning). I couldn’t be concerned with multiplication tables; I had a Trapper Keeper, some Thunder Cats folders, and a couple of bendy pens with feathers at the top. To a certain degree, this MO has stuck with me (I realize this is fairly embarrassing information that may or may not make me seem gay).

My Mossimo shoulder bag (which is available at Target for a very reasonable price) allowed me to store my trinkets in a variety of compartments and pockets. The Mossimo shoulder bag doesn’t have a lot of room for books, but that was okay for me, I didn’t have that many to begin with. The ladies loved it too. I got a lot of comments from my female friends for my Mossimo shoulder bag. I almost felt like an adult (little did they know that my bag was half full of toys I got at the dollar store).

I was able to stay a lot more organized with my Mossimo shoulder bag (a byproduct that I had not expecting). I had originally bought the bag out of a socio-cultural obligation to fit in (and because of all the neat compartments), I hadn’t expected for it to help me in the classroom. But that’s what it did. Within a year of purchasing my Mossimo shoulder bag, I had a degree from the State University of New Jersey.

Some say I graduated because I had been at college for five and half years and I had no choice, but I know better. It was the Mossimo shoulder bag, and I am forever indebted.