Owner’s Manual for Raising a Baby
The Charts: What Are They?
I started this article on a light note about having an owner’s manual for raising a baby and of course much of being a parent is also instinct and common sense. That said, there are indeed development charts that tell us which milestone baby should reach at any given time.
If you plan to use the development charts, it is important to remember that babies are all magnificently individual and your baby is simply not going to reach every objective on the chart at exactly the “right” time. That fact in no way means that your baby is not “normal” and every parent will be wise to remember that.
On the other side of that coin, it is a comfort for a parent to know which “landmark” in the baby’s life will be approaching and a relief to see him or her reach that stage.
Point to Remember: Your baby is unique and will not be exactly like the neighbor’s baby or a relative’s baby in development stages.
Okay, So Get on with the Manual Already!
Now that you know that the charts are not meant to be religiously followed as if raising pole beans, I will list some milestones that will be a sort of loose guide for a parent to know what to expect as baby continues to delight the family as further development continues. I will use “he” sometimes and “she” sometimes when talking about the baby.
Month One
Baby will be an attentive audience when spoken to. Voices will be followed and he will look at your face when you speak. If an older sibling shows a toy to the baby, he will be able to follow after it with his eyes but seem to have no desire to actually “play” quite yet. Generally the only sounds coming from baby will be cries.
Month Two
Expect more “baby sounds” what some people will call coos. Often it may appear as if baby is trying to hold a conversation with a parent or sibling. Let her do that and interact with her as you talk back to her no matter what she is saying. The parent may not know what she is answering, but baby will know!
Also sometime throughout this second month, expect to see a smile or two covering baby’s face once in a while. That is always an exciting development milestone for a parent to see.
Months Three and Four
At some point in this time period, baby will clutch onto items that are handed to him. Around the third month milestone, he won’t reach for items, but before he leaves the four month stage, the baby will probably be doing that reaching. In the course of that third month you’ll hear more new sounds coming from baby.
Also in the three and four month period, baby will show signs of recognizing parent voices and voices of other people in the household. She may get very excited to hear a voice that she knows. You will probably be able to prop the baby up during the fourth month sometime, but she will not be able to sit on her own quite yet without being propped. She will, however, be able to control her head somewhere in the fourth month.
A parent will notice during this time period that one of the favorite “toys” the baby will have is his or her own hands. The fascination can go on for a long time just playing with her hands. Watch for the first signs of hand-eye coordination and other motor development.
Child Development for Five to Six Months
These are the months where it starts to seem as if baby is taking in all his surroundings and learning things all day long. It’s true, he is, and many of the things that he is exploring and learning about will end up going into his mouth.
Remember that babies develop at different rates, but chances are that the parent will start to notice the first signs of teething during months five and six. Don’t rely on an “owner’s manual” for things like this because every author will have his or her own “remedy” and your baby will not necessarily respond to most of them. Find out what works better in your own case and stick with it.
Extra safety precautions will need to be taken during this time period. The baby will not be walking yet, of course, but she will be putting anything she can get access to into her mouth. Another concern is that she will be doing a lot of rolling around during this stage of development. She will probably be able to hold a bottle.
Whoa, Baby! Beginning the second half of the first year . . .
Child development during this stage is filled with all kinds of milestones and is exciting for parent and for baby alike. Again I will reiterate that if a certain achievement is listed and your baby isn’t ready for it yet, it does not mean anything is wrong. If there is a real fear or an intuition that something is not right, simply mention it to baby’s pediatrician to put your mind at ease.
Months Seven and Eight
Baby is suddenly not so content to “sit still” any longer. Life is filled with wanting to move as much as possible and the baby is wonderfully “animated.” He is sleeping somewhat less than during the first six months of development. He chatters a lot in his “baby language” and will bang on things just to hear the noise he makes.
Watch for signs that some of her fine motor skills will be practiced during this time period. Since you will be introducing baby foods this second part of the first year, watch for signs that the little one may or may not like certain foods. Do not force her to eat anything that she doesn’t seem to tolerate well. Watch for food allergies that may develop at this time, too.
If it already hasn’t been done . . .
If your house is not “baby proofed” by this point in the baby’s development, hop to it! The little tyke will start pulling herself up against furniture and by month eight or nine, you’ll most likely have a crawling and mobile baby on your hands. Baby proofing is very important so research what needs to be done in addition to obvious things like making sure no small objects are lying around (choking hazard); cords from appliances and lamps hanging in the baby’s reach are moved; outlet protectors are used, etc.
The list of things to do for baby proofing can be extensive, so be sure to read materials on the subject. Each home has unique hazards to baby. Some experts suggest the parent should get down on hands and knees to see the rooms of the house from “baby level.” Often cords and small objects a parent may not have thought about will appear as a huge temptation from that level.
Months Nine and Ten
The baby of the house is suddenly appearing to be more and more ready for a “toddler” stage as time goes by. A parent may enjoy teaching simple things at this point to see if the baby will pick up on it. Nothing extensive of course; perhaps something as simple as pointing out the cat and naming it when talking to the baby or pointing out things in a picture book. You may want to try some “games” such as peek-a-boo as well. You’ll know what he’s ready for at each stage of development.
Don’t expect daily routines to make baby squeal with delight during this stage. Bath time and getting her diaper changed or having a change of clothing will not make her happy.
Baby may start showing signs of wanting to walk while holding onto furniture or someone’s hand around the 10 month point. Don’t be surprised if he starts calling out “cat” or “ma” or a few other recognizable words or sounds around this time period.
Months Eleven and Twelve
Congratulations, you have nearly guided your baby through the first year of development! These last two months of the first year will feel like a whirlwind of activity for baby as well as parent!
One of the most exciting things that happens for many (not all!) babies during this period of development is that she will take her first steps! Remember that if the first birthday arrives and the baby is not walking, it’s perfectly fine. Some babies take longer, some start walking earlier.
This is a good time to introduce some toddler toys to help with motor skill development. A baby nearing the first year mark will often enjoy picture books and will have longer attention spans for such activities than in previous months. New vocabulary words will be added to the baby’s repertoire rapidly now.
Final words about child development . . .
When singing “Happy Birthday, Dear Baby, Happy Birthday to You!” remember that the second year of development will be filled with just as many new milestones. A birthday doesn’t mark an end to babyhood as much as a beginning to the exciting world of todderhood.
