Self Injury: Inside the Mind of a Teenage Cutter

It is the hardest thing to witness, Your daughter flipping out and running towards scissors behind the counter of a contolled environment , all she wants to do is cut and she will do what it takes to achieve that. Hopsitilized for almost 3 months and on and off in the past this young talented girl seems to get no where. Batteling depression and suicidal thoughts has left her in a weak comprise. The girl I speak of is my daughter soon to be 16 and behind the walls of a mental institution.

Sarah, a wonderful and talented young lady, loves to act and has been very succesful at it. Acting has been her dream, her desire since she was little, plays like the Christmas Carroll, Alice in Wonderland and other roles comes quite natural for her.
So what happened? Her joy in acting has diminished, her well being reduced to seclusion, aware of this has raised a red flag. When confronted with these differences we found our Talented and peaceful daughter has a rage inside of her like we never known. Cutting since 8 years old to releave the (Non real) feeling has taking its toll on her. For that matter on us as well. Her last episode was quite grusome slashing her arms and wrists to such an extent that blood has spattered everywhere has literally driven us to seek serious help for her.

why we wonder? She went from bulimia to cutting and these are not all superficial cuts. Many required stiches and/or glue.
All i want is to be able to help her so badly yet i am the last person she will confide in.. So what do i do? Continue to be supportive and try with all my might to assure her she is loved..Her behavior is so out of control they have had to restrain her, inject her, and send her to the quiet room. Each time she claims she will kill her self when given the opportunity.

Medicines have been introduced, increased and unfortunetly are not helping. I am her Mom and want to help so badly yet i cannot. Her refusal to talk to staff is playing a big role in her recovery.at this point in time she seems stagnet.

Why depresssion? Why self injury? Why not the normal teenage routine?

My answer to this is simply because her mind is made up, she wants to stay this way, she wants to hurt, she wants to die!
The only thing we as parents can do is stay beside them regardless their intension. This is hard for me.I dont want to give in and let her cut or hurt herself but the realization is she will do it the first chance she gets.

No one knows how or why cutting became such an epidcemic amongst teens, but we do know we cant give up!

They are our children and even if they push us away they still need us.. My hope is someday she will be stable on medication thus lesson the chance of self harm.Until then i will be my daughters support and more importantly her Mom.. bestowing unconditional love at all times.