Support the Troops: Help the Soldier’s Family

Do you know someone that has a soldier currently serving overseas? With the number of Reserve and National Guard troops serving in Iraq and Afghanistan most of us have a neighbor or a friend who is the wife of a soldier is trying to keep life together while her husband is off fighting a war. These wives often have their lives pulled out from under them at a moments notice and then are left to figure out how to keep life together for themselves and their children while their soldier is gone with little support from the military. Sometimes the best way to support the troops is to help their family.

There are many organizations out there the support the troops during deployment and to assist during and emergency most focus on the soldier or family emergencies. There is little emotional support for the soldier’s wife left behind who holds down a job and tries to be both mom and dad to their children while still maintaining some level of sanity. For those wives who are not part of the regular military they do not have the safe surroundings of a military post and other military wives to help her through the day to day things. Reserve and National Guard members are often scattered all over the state and wives have had little to no interaction with one another. When you think about supporting your troops you might want to consider bringing that support closer to home and offering some help to their wife and family.

How Do I Help?

It is like the soldier’s wife is uncomfortable asking for help or taking money from anyone. There is a determination to do things on her own and the concern of letting her soldier down by admitting she can’t handle it all by herself. Her goal is to make her soldier proud and asking for anything does not fit into her vision of “doing just fine”.

Everyone always needs food. Instead of dropping off a bag of food send a girt card from the local grocery store. If you are worried about the person being embarrassed drop it in the mailbox without a return address.

Yard Work

This is usually the most hated job of any military wife. While others have husbands out cutting the grass, the soldier’s wife does it herself. When she is out cutting her grass, grab your lawn mower and help or simply just continue from your lawn to hers when cutting your own.

Give Her A Day Off

Remember a soldier’s wife suddenly becomes a single parent when her husband leaves. She does not have someone to “give her a break” so she can simply have some alone time. It is very difficult to sort through her own worries and fears when she is constantly putting on a brave face for the kids. Invite the children to go to the movies, the park, or the beach or just to the mall with you. Giving mom some alone time will do wonders for her peace of mind and will also give the kids a break from “taking care of mom” as they probably promised their dad before he left. For a day just let her have the time she needs to miss her soldier.

Listen When She Needs To Vent

The soldier’s wife is living without her best friend and partner in life. The person she is used to talking to when she is scared or hurt is no longer available. She is too busy trying to keep him from worrying so often she just sucks up her own worries and pain and keeps going. She doesn’t want you to fix things or even give her answers. Just be there and listen when she needs a friend. Remember she is a wife without a husband.

When asked, most soldiers will tell you before they leave their biggest concern are not for themselves but for their family. They worry more about their wife and family at home than they do about what might be around the next corner in a combat zone. So, the next time you want to support the troops; do something nice for their families.