Ten Reasons Why You Should Not Buy the New Madden ’07

Just the mention of the word ‘Madden’, and gamers everywhere unite into a chorus of “football!” It is so popular that it has entered the unwritten Sports Bible of names and things that go by just one name. It is now up there with Tiger, LeBron, Shaq, Magic, and Danica.

Just say the word ‘Madden’, and everybody’s first thought is of the video game, not the Hall of Fame coach/announcer John Madden, even though it is his namesake on the game. Each year, Madden is among the biggest selling games on the market. It routinely sells several million copies. Honestly, what gamer has never played a Madden game?

The Madden ’07 game, which just recently hit stores everywhere, is flying off the shelves like half-price Oreos. On its first day of release, people actually lined up and waited until midnight just to be among the first to buy it. That’s serious dedication, devotion, and a little bit of insanity. Why do so many people buy the Madden games each year?

The answer is easy. They are fun to play. After last years’ version, Madden ’06, left many disappointed, a new and retooled version – Madden ’07, is now impressing people. However, there are several reasons why you should not go out and buy this game, brand new, at your favorite local retailer. And here they are.

#10) It costs $60. This is a lot of money for any game, especially one that has a sequel each year. It makes it even worse when you consider that the game is very similar each year.

#9) The fans look ridiculous. The graphics in this game are pristine. For somebody who has never seen any Madden games, they may think that you are watching a real football game. They are that good; the on-field graphics, that is. When the camera pans into the stands, the fans look like a giant cluster of colored Play-Doh. You can’t distinguish the people from the background at some times. It is understood that the players are where the attention should be, but with the advances in technology you’d think that the fans in the stands, for a 2006 release game, would look better than they did in the 1996 version of Madden.

#8) The Madden Curse. This is just like the Sports Illustrated Curse. In that one, it is considered bad luck to be on the cover of S.I., especially if you are predicted to win the World Series, Super Bowl, or any other championship. The Madden Curse is plaguing the player who graces the annual cover of the game. Eddie George, Michael Vick, Marshall Faulk, to name a few are some of the ‘cover models’ whose career either ended shortly after being on the cover, or hasn’t taken off like it should (I’m talking to you Michael ‘Mr. Potential’ Vick). This year has Shaun Alexander on the cover. I guess that means that the Seahawks aren’t getting back to the Super Bowl.

#7) At least one of your friends must have it. Why shell out $60 for a game that all your buddies have? Unless you like playing one-player season modes (which are fun), just use their copy. If you go to their house and say that you’d like to play against them, they will not turn you away. You can’t turn down a Madden challenge. So just use their game and save some money.

#6) You will be missing work or school. This game is addictive. It causes hundreds of thousands of missed work hours each year. The number of sick days being used this week must be staggering. Luckily most schools and colleges haven’t started yet.

#5) There are better games out there to blow $60 on. Try playing Pikmin, Mario Sunshine, Tales of Symphonia, or Zelda Windwaker for GameCube, or Deadrising for XBOX 360, or Kingdom Hearts 2 for PlayStation 2. These are better games that you may not have tried.

#4) Spend the money on your girlfriend/wife. Say what you will but video games are never a substitute for women. No game I’ve ever played compares to being with a real live woman. With $60, you can do wonders to your lady. She will appreciate it.

#3) If you wait a few months, the game will cost $20. This game, Madden, always sells millions of copies so quickly that Sony, Nintendo, and Microsoft drop its price from $60 to $20 within a few months. If you’re just a casual fan, then wait until January. Stores will sell it for $20 and eBay will have it for under $10.

#2) EA Sports. This is the company that owns the conglomerate known as Madden. They have basically destroyed all competition in the football arena. Remember NFL Gameday? How about Blitz? With players contracted to EA, they control the largest piece of the pie when it comes to football games. Not very nice.

And the number one reason why you should not buy Madden ’07…

#1) It is the same game each year. Seriously, how different can Madden ’07 be from Madden ’06, ’05, ’04, ’03, ’02…? Football is football. The game doesn’t change. Only the bells and whistles change each year. So what if you can create a player or design what he looks like? If you want a football player to look like you, get off the couch and go play some real football, you know, outside, with a ball, one that you can physically pick up and throw. Madden is a marketing wonder. The game consistently sells millions, but it is, in essence, the same thing each year. Pure genius.