The Cruise

Yes, indeed. Schizophrenia. That’s what it was all right. Books are great for diagnosing things. Why did I spend all that time trying to get help when all I had to do was a little research? I just don’t know what to do about it, now that I have a name for it.

I was standing in the kitchen staring out the window. My poor husband. He was completely normal except for this. Hearing voices that weren’t there. Voices with a mission for him, no less. Hell, half the time he didn’t hear me but he hears voices in his head!! All he could say was I was jealous I didn’t hear the same voices.

When all this started I went to the minister for help and guidance. The only guidance he wanted to give me was to the couch. Next I went to a secular counselor. She was proving to be very helpful, till she helped herself to my knee. My husband may be off mentally but he’s on target about the world being sick. I just don’t fancy his approach. Cutting us off. How could we possibly do that? We have to live here! I’m not Annie Oakley or any other pioneer woman. I’m used to going to the market for my needs. I wouldn’t know how to make clothes or bread. All the neighbors shake their heads at me as I pass. It’s humiliating to be viewed as the odd one out when I could cast enough stones at them to build a sky scraper.

“Mom, are you ready?” Daughter-in-law #3 laid her hands on my shoulder. I guess the car was loaded with our first installments to the new location.
“No, but let’s get going.” I carried out the carton of dishes I just packed and got into the back seat of the mini van with my other two daughters-in-law who will henceforth be simply referred to as daughters.

Our new home to-be was located out in the wilderness off the main road, hiding behind trees that were blocking the view of the nosy by passers who jeered and cursed my Husband while he slaved over the construction with my three sons.
As the van neared the building I noticed something odd about it. Trees that had surrounded it previously had been downed for extra wood and I could see the shape of the building project clearer. Animals were milling around grazing on the forest floor vegetation. I know nothing about husbandry. Glad my daughters had been farm girls growing up. All my experience with four footed creatures was at the zoo, which is what our “yard” resembled right now.
Hubby met me at the door and with a sweep of his hand ushered me in.
“You know, this looks like a – ”
“Come on I want to show you our apartments!” He was so excited.
Our place was on the third floor. “Why so high?” I queried.
“We’ll have sunroofs for lighting. The lower levels will be darker. Our power will also be sun generated.”

I toured the upper level slowly. It was very nice. Rooms for the kids and their wives, and a huge kitchen. Extra rooms for nurseries when needed. A sun deck and large family room. Library with more books that we’ll ever need. Lots of books on basic survival. I might use those. Books on how to can, how to sew, how to keep from loosing your sanity. Tons of books on God. What did we need those for. According to Hubby he had first hand relationship with the creator!! Now I’m beginning to scoff, just like the towns folk!

The second level was storage for food, medicines and other necessities. Looked like enough supplies to last a year for eight adults and our livestock. I wouldn’t see another living soul for a year!!! I was beginning to feel claustrophobic and we hadn’t moved in yet.

During the days of moving the villagers stared at us like felons. We weren’t any better than they were as far as they could see. One of my daughters shivered every time she saw a group of teenagers. They had attempted to rape her one night on her way home from the work, the police wouldn’t do anything about it, they were just boys having fun. I saw several of the business owners who had taken advantage of us by over charging when they learned of our intentions to separate from society. It wasn’t a kosher environment we were escaping, but it was all I knew. Many of the women had tried unsuccessfully to seduce my sons. Glad my boys had common sense. No telling what diseases these women needed treatment for, as thin and pale as they were.

Moving day was here. Hubby, sons and well trained hunting dogs had herded all the animals in for the night and tucked them into their stalls on the lower level. The doors closed and locked automatically after the last four footed creature entered. How did Hubby arrange for that? While I was on the third floor unloading cartons, I attempted to pull a chair up to use as a ladder. It was nailed to the floor. Whatever for. Odd how the shelves are built with little ledges.

Splish, splash. Looking up I saw raindrops hitting the skylight. A loud swishing sound followed the rain. We all ran to the windows and watched as water started rising up from cracks in the ground, burying the tree trunks, lapping at the bark, raising dirt and leaves off the terra firma. Muck. Yuck.

“What’s going on?” I asked, looking nervously at Hubby. His voices had predicted this, I wouldn’t believe I was seeing what I was seeing.
“You’ll know soon enough,” he promised.

Days, then weeks of heavy rainfall, accompanied by thunder and lightening pursued. As the water got higher trucks pulled up in our yard crammed with people that had poked fun at us over the past year. Men started shooting at our windows, cursing us, trying to gain entrance. Sure, we were going to let armed men inside. Right, get real. One lady held up her infant and begged us to take it on board. On board? That’s when I remembered my first impression of our new home. It looked like a boat because it was a boat! Hubby had been for warned of possible attacks. The windows were bullet proof.

After another week we started to float. I always wanted to take a cruise when we retired, but this didn’t meet my expectations. The boat started to sway and toss as waves hit the side and we bounced off the submerged trees, hills and buildings. The furniture stayed mobile, but I made frequent trips to the john.

The days that followed were anything but boring. When I went into the walk-in freezer to get dinner, a penguin riding around on the back of a polar bear greeted me. Then there was laundry day (which with eight people was everyday) when I found two chimpanzees tumbling about in the family sized dryers. I went to the bathroom and found a snake in the toilet and a duck in the tub. The straw that broke the camel’s back,(figuratively, we did have two of them on board) was the lion I found stretched out on my lazy boy licking his privates. Now I feel the king of beasts can sit anywhere he wants too, licking whatever he wants, but this queen’s lazy boy is off limits, I thought as I tipped the chair over and spilled it’s contents onto the floor. The surly lion sauntered away. Smart boy, he must have heard about a woman’s wrath.

The rain finally let up and I was on the sun deck looking over a world of water. Not a single living soul was about, with the exception of the whales and dolphins that swam along side of the ship waving their fins at us and gently rocking our vessel. Bodies that had been floating for weeks had become fish food and no longer existed to mar the view. I turned my back and something wet, rough and long ran up and down my neck. I froze. Hubby laughed. Turning slowly, not having a clue of what to expect I met the face of a giraffe. His body was two stories below us but his tongue was washing my back!!!!! Yuck, yuck, yuck.

Tin cans!! It was my passion to resell tin cans and the water’s surface was loaded with them! I scooped out a dozen with a fish net when Hubby questioned my motives.
“These are worth money!” I answered
“Oh yeah? Who you going to sell them too?”
“I…We…Ohhhhhh!” I tossed them back into the ocean.

It took months for the waters to recede but it finally happened. The winds had blown the waters away, our homing birds not only found land they refused to come home and our boat settled on a mountaintop. A beautifully multi-colored bow decorated the sky and our doors to the outside opened. All by themselves? I think not. The animals rushed out, and not in any orderly fashion. With sheer delight and freedom they raced around, rolling in mud and butting heads with each other. They definitely were not returning to their cramped confines. A few looked back momentarily for one last view of their cooks before disappearing into the horizon to fend for themselves once again.

“Now what? Does your mysterious voice have any more commands for us?” I asked Hubby as I leaned into his shoulders, watching the last passengers to disembark, a pair of turtles, carrying two snails.
“Yep. Now we’re to re-populate the earth.” He said between nibbles on my neck.
“I gave you three sons already, I’m leaving that up to them. And if you don’t like it go find…Ooops, there isn’t anyone else.” I smirked up at him wickedly as I led him back upstairs. I was beginning to like this voice in his head, who cares if I can’t hear it, at least Hubby listens.

Gen 6:1-9:28
2 Peter 3:5-7