The National Problem of Children and Parental Abductions

Missing children in America, we see them on the milk cartons, flyers posted at Wal-Mart, post offices, when a child is taken “Amber Alerts” flash across the country and the media profiles information known to help assist in finding the child. Most people believe that children are kidnaped by strangers, sex offenders looking for victims but the fact is, 78% are taken by family members. Parental abduction has risen in over the past ten years, so much so, that the topic of parental abduction can no longer be ignored.

If you’re thinking 78% doesn’t sound so bad, we’re talking about over 200,000 children a year. We all keep our children close to us in large crowds, while shopping and none of us really consider the possibility of a family member abducting them. Divorce rates, parental separations and the numbers of children living with a single parent or step parents continue to rise side by side with the numbers of parental abductions. All of these factors attribute largely to the actual reasoning of parental abductions.

Parental abductions are the result of bad relationships, bad communication and children often are used in hurtful ways. Some abducting parents are so outraged, they use the children simply to hurt the other parent. Domestic violence cases outline that both men and women when asked why they stayed in abusive relationships commonly listed “for the kids” as a reason. Abusers often make threats like, “if you leave you’ll never see the kids again, you’ll never have them and you can’t take them away from me”.

Children are the biggest victims and the affects are lasting, some never fully recover from the trauma. Children need consistency to grow and learn. Is taking a child away from their home, family, school, church, friends a consistent life? Some parents who choose to abduct their parents have good intentions of raising the child in a “better” environment but often end up living life on the run. Both the child and the parent, miserable and terrified, always thinking of the next move.

One question that has always entered my mind, is why do these parents feel abduction is their best option? When looking at all the cases of missing children, some of these parents are suffering with mental conditions from depression to bi-polar disorders, others are citizens of other countries, some parents have went through long child custody battles in the court system and lost, there is not one simple answer as to why. All of these factors aren’t safe for children, to live with someone who needs mental help, to be taken into a new culture or running with a bitter parent who lost custody. It’s often for a parent who loses custody to find loop holes in the law, abducting the child to another state and applying for custody there. Some feel they have better chances in another court of law.

Parent’s are the only ones who abduct children either, often grandparents, aunts, and other members of the family take the children away. Many factors play a role in these abductions but most almost always initiate with family problems that didn’t involve the children to begin with. One story sticks out in my mind, a grown woman with children who was abused at the hands of her mentally-ill mother as a child, allows to have limited contact with the children for the mentally-ill grandmother. Common scenario, grandmother doesn’t believe that her daughter is capable of taking adequate care of the children for whatever reason and she takes the children. Grandma doesn’t have to be mentally-ill though, sometimes families practice religious beliefs that another family member just finds to be hideous and they opt to take matters in their own hands to save the child. Regardless, there are hundreds of thousands of reasons but are there that many ways to protect a child who may be in danger?

Even though the creation of the “Amber Alert” is a great thing, people volunteer countless man hours to find missing children and the media helps spread the news, it’s not enough. The root of the problem still isn’t addressed. Every state has a child protective services unit actively involved in the welfare of children yet surprisingly most aren’t involved in child custody arguments resulting in divorce. Isn’t parental abduction a safety risk? Organizations committed to the safety of children, the government and state leaders need to callaborate to re-evaluate the dangers and work together to design ways to prevent parental abduction. It makes no sense to treat a symptom without treating the cause.

Some states have taken some legal steps in the right direction by adopting the UCCJEA (Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act) actually stops the reasoning that a parent may gain custody of a child through another court. Let’s say that Jim and Janet are fighting for custody, Jim who lives in Florida wins the case. Janet since their divorce lives in Kentucky, Janet abducts the children to Kentucky and she visits the county attorney’s office who knows nothing about the case in Florida. Janet walks out with temporary custody and Jim’s order from florida is a useless piece of paper. The case now isn’t about child custody but which state has jurisdiction. The UCCJEA, in this case would dismiss Janet’s efforts to abuse the system, enforce Jim’s custody order and give court decisions stability.

If you fear that your child’s non-custodial parent may take your child watch for signs.

� Have you argued about visitation arrangements?
Ã? Does the non-custodial parent feel they aren’t a part of the family?
� Disagreements about child support?
Ã? Has the non-custodial parent said the child shouldn’t be with you?
Ã? Does your family practice religion or beliefs that the non-custodial parent doesn’t approve?
Ã? Does the non-custodial parent often make threats but doesn’t do anything?

If you feel that you’re child may be in danger, go back to court, insist on supervised visits. Call child welfare and tell them what’s going on and what you fear. Tell your family about any arguments you have with the non-custodial parent, make sure you have information about the non-custodial parents just in case. Information would include license tag numbers for vehicles, photographs of them with your child, telephone numbers and addresses of their friends and family.

Don’t worry if you feel like your snooping, you’re taking care of your child. You wouldn’t let a stranger you don’t know anything about take your child for a weekend to an unknown place, even if the person wrote a best selling book about child safety! If you feel that your child isn’t in danger but you still want to help out, visit the resources listed. All of the organizations listed in the resources take donations that are much needed, they also offer other ways that everyday people can help locate our country’s missing children and to help reduce the numbers of parental abductions.