Things You Think You Know but Really Don’t

There’s a tremendous amount of information out there that is commonly accepted, but patently untrue. And I’m not even talking about the link between Saddam and 9/11! I’m talking about somewhat less important myths that are accepted as reality. With that in mind, I offer up some conventional wisdom that doesn’t make you particularly wise should you choose to follow convention.

Myth: Popeye’s Chicken & Biscuits was named after Popeye the Sailor Man.
Reality: The deliciously spicy chicken well-loved throughout the South was in fact named after another character that was named after the spinach-loving sailor. The chicken franchise actually got its name from Popeye Doyle, the character played by Gene Hackman in The French Connection movies.

Myth: Toilet water flows in opposite directions in the Northern and Southern Hemispheres.
Reality: One of the all-time great episodes of the Simpsons is based on this myth. Bart dials up Australia to find out if the toilet water flows in the opposite direction, leaves the phone off the hook and winds up with a huge phone bill to explain. His punishment involves apologizing to the Australian people. If only Bart hadn’t listened to Lisa, who in this particular case wasn’t as smart as usual. The Coriolis Effect is central to this myth; the effect involves the deflection of moving objects based on the rotation of the earth. It can be seen in the fact that tornadoes rotate in opposite directions whether they are north or south of the equator. But the effect simply isn’t strong enough to affect water going down a drain. The direction of the water depends upon plumping, not the Coriolis Effect. If you so desire, you can renovate your bathroom fixtures so that the water swirls down the drain opposite to the direction it goes down the drains of all your friends. Blow their minds, man!

Myth: Big Ben is the name of the huge clock in London.
Reality: Big Ben is not the name of the famous clock, but rather the enormous bell inside the clock tower. Why is it called Big Ben? Well, it’s called big because it weighs over thirteen tons and is over seven feet tall. The Ben part is more difficult. The foremost theory suggests that it was named in honor of Sir Benjamin Hall, the Chief Commissioner of Works.

Myth: Joan of Arc was French.
Reality: A national heroine of France and canonized Saint, Joan was not technically French. She was born in the autonomous state of Domremy. Although Domremy was loyal to the French monarchy, they were not under any legal jurisdiction.

Myth: The accused witches in Salem were burned at the stake.
Reality: Not one single accused witch during the infamous Salem witch hunt was burned at the stake. Nineteen were hanged, one was pressed to death under stones, and the rest died in prison. Actually, not one single accused witch in North American under British dominion was ever burned anywhere in the colonies.

Myth: Swallowed gum takes seven years to digest.
Reality: Well, it does take longer than most food to make it way through the digestive track, but not nearly seven years. In the meantime, the swallower may experience digestion problems such as diarrhea, but it will come out in the end.

Myth: The Baby Ruth candy bar was named after Babe Ruth.
Reality: Not even close. Although the jury is still out on exactly how the candy bar got its name, it is known the Babe had nothing to do with it. The bar is supposedly named after the daughter of the only President to serve non-sequential terms, Grover Cleveland. His baby daughter was named Ruth. Until definitive evidence surfaces to indicate otherwise, that’s the non-mythical explanation.

Myth: The day after Thanksgiving is the busiest shopping day of the year.
Reality: Normally, Black Friday as it’s known doesn’t even wind up in the top five. Usually, either December 23 or the last Saturday before Christmas winds up as the busiest shopping day of the year.

Myth: Twinkies have an indefinite shelf life; they can be eaten decades after purchase.
Reality: If you’ve got a Twinkie in your pantry that you bought over a month ago, it’s time to toss it. That may not seem like a long time in comparison to decades, but for a cake product the official twenty-five day shelf life is pretty impressive. The reason? Twinkies have no dairy products in their ingredients.

Myth: The long-awaited showdown between King Kong and Godzilla had different winners in the end according to country.
Reality: This one has been around so long that it just seems as if it has to be true. King Kong was an American creation, so he should win in America; Godzilla should win in Japan for the same reason. Well, as it turns out, there was no winner in any version. King Kong Versus Godzilla ends rather ambiguously, true, with King Kong surfacing from the water to return to his island home. But remember: Godzilla came from the sea, he can survive beneath it.

Myth: Some men dressed in women’s clothing in order to sneak aboard lifeboats on the Titanic.
Reality: There is no known case of this happening. It is not mentioned in any of the official records, it is not mentioned in any diaries or letters written by survivors, it is not mentioned in any court cases related to the sinking. It didn’t happen, though movies love to portray it as fact.

Myth: Massive blackouts result in increased birth rates nine months later.
Reality: Turning off the TV can be done any day of the year. A loss of electricity just doesn’t result in an increase in amorous feelings. There have been no cases of significant increases in birth rates nine months after a blackout; even giving it a two week cushion before and after the actual date of the blackout doesn’t show any increase over normal rates.

Myth: Domestic abuse cases skyrocket on Super Bowl Sunday.
Reality: This one has been around for a long time, as well, and it certainly has all the makings of being true. Alcohol+self-identity through sports association=women getting hit. It sounds true, but it simply isn’t. There is no statistical data to conclude that spousal abuse increases on Super Bowl Sunday.

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