True Love vs Infatuation

If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with? I reject this notion of settling with every fiber of my being, and my being is high in fiber. Maybe I’m a hopeless romantic or maybe I’m just hopeless, but the idea of settling for someone based solely on their geographic location is unfair to the settler and unfair to consolation prize. I realize that life isn’t fair, but the things that we do have control over, we need to grab hold of the reigns and direct with fervor into our favor. I make circumstances in my life, I don’t bow down to them; especially in matters of love.

Now, I’m not talking about some stalker who can’t take ‘no’ or a restraining order for an answer. Love means never having to say “Yes, officer, that’s the guy who put the hidden camera in my toilet bowl.” Unrequited love is when you think you’re chasing a certain piece of tail, but it turns out you were only chasing your own.

Mutual Amor not sought through to its fruition is a universe dying to be born. I believe in destiny, but I also believe in reincarnation, so we could keep playing this song until we get it right, and it might be longer than “In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida” by the time we’re finished. If you expect that your life is a winning lottery ticket, unscratched, and sitting at the bottom of some landfill somewhere, you know that you’re going to have to go through some garbage, but you’re willing to do so. “Fail at love, and the other tests don’t matter.” – Richard Bach

It takes two to play this game, however, so one desperate party does not a lasting love make. And “Love” must be clearly defined if we’re to assign unyielding allegiance to the pursuit of it. Infatuation is Counterfeit Love, but many a desperate soul have gone down in flames, swearing to its authenticity. Once bitten, twice in denial. False idols wear false teeth.

Infatuation is the Call of the Wild, Love is the call of the Soul. In one situation, there is reassurance and comfort, in the other, relentless doubt and insecurity. Infatuation is afraid to examine itself, because they’re things it may not want to find; questions it might not want answered. Love investigates itself thoroughly and gets a buzz in the process. This is because Love, when it’s the genuine article, cannot exist outside of the present moment. You don’t want love to have an ‘ed’ at the end of it. Ed is dead and buriED, love is the current current coursing through your veins. Love isn’t the promise of a future either. It can only exist in the Now. Promises of forever are great, but they can only happen one Now at a time.

Infatuation says things like, “let’s run away and get married quick, I can’t risk losing you.” Fear always lives in the past or future. Ever notice that? A “loving moment” should be redundant, so take it to the Department of Redundancy Department.

Stop chasing love, turnaround, and let it catch you. I think the ideal relationship is a friendship that doesn’t have to be anything more than that, but just so happens to be. That’s not settling, that’s the real deal. There is no “need” in love, no requirement. You can’t need something you already have. If you say “I love you,” then that’s a statement that stands alone, and can’t be followed up with “but I require this, this, and this…” You’d have to look that one up in the contradictionary. You can always be with the one you love, because love is always just being – there is no requirement. Love is. And that’s all.

“We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.” – Tom Robbins