Waiting at the Doctor’s Office Can Stir Up a Lot of Thoughts! The Waiting Game and All It’s Glory

Have you ever actually been in a doctor’s office? I mean his or her REAL office? The office with all the books on the bookshelf, the fish tank, desk, phone, etc? Why don’t we see that office but maybe once? They only seem to use that office for your first initial visit or to tell you you’re gonna kick the bucket. It seems as if they don’t want us to know they sometimes excuse themselves from a patient in the exam room to run into their office and look stuff up in all those medical books. They don’t want patients to hear them say, “What the hell was that? Damn! That was really gross. How has that guy walked around with that thing? Eeeew.”

When you’re sitting in a doctor’s waiting room and you’re finally called, you get happy inside with that in-your-own-head happy dance, right? You feel like you won something and think to yourself, “Yay. I was finally called! I’m going in! I’m gonna see the doctor now!” But, bursting your bubble, you are really just being moved to a smaller “waiting room” to again, um, wait. To add to your disappointment, sometimes you actually see a smaller versioned magazine rack INSIDE the actual “exam room.” Think about it. If the staff didn’t know you were going to be forced to wait even longer in this smaller “exam waiting room,” why the magazine rack? That’s your first clue that now, you’re gonna be waiting there. I think they just change your scenic atmosphere so it may seem as if they’re actually making progress in your waiting time. It’s supposed to give us the feeling as if we’ve graduated to the next level.
So, you’re in a different room.
Waiting.
Again.
Alone.

On top of that, you’re cold because you’re naked with an oversized piece of paper resembling the tissue stuffed inside of a shoe box around your body along with a loose string. After finally deciding whether to wear the opening to your paper dress in the front or the back, you can’t seem to keep it from exposing any given part of your body. Feeling like an idiot, you push down on the chest but the armpit is now exposed. You push down the crotch and your chest is exposed. You continue waiting while sitting on top of another piece of paper quite similar to the deli paper the butcher uses to wrap up food. (Or is it?) You’re left there alone feeling as if you’re actually an animal awaiting it’s slaughter and looking around for a deli pickle beside your bum to make the package complete.

Suddenly, you hear the knock at the door. (Yeah, as if you weren’t undressed and in your paper-doll attire by NOW.) The happy dance within your head begins once more and you think, “Yay! I really AM gonna see the doctor now! I might actually make it home in time for Law & Order!”
Nope. Think again. It’s the nurse. She’s come to end your happy dance and to tease your emotional state of mind by taking your temperature and blood pressure. Human contact and attention is short lived. It’s over within 60 seconds.
She leaves the room assuring you the doctor will be “right in.” Yeah, right.
You then find yourself alone.
Again.
Waiting.

When the doctor finally makes his 3 minute appearance, you put your clothes back on, walk out of the exam room only to realize you now have to figure out how the hell to find the way back to the front desk through the labyrinth of doors and hallways. You’re now wishing you had paid more attention when being led into your exam room or maybe bring some bread crumbs with next time. Once you have found your way, you pull your check book out to actually pay these people for their lovely accommodations and pleasant experience. Afterward, you get to the pharmacy to fill your prescription.
“When do you want to pick up your medicine?” the pharmacy technician asks.
“Well, how long will it be?” you ask.
“Oh, it’ll be at least an hour. Would you like to wait?”
“Mm-kay. I’ll wait.”
**sigh**
So, you sit down and wait.
Again.
Alone.
But, at least you’re not in a paper dress.