Why I Created PersonaCheck for Online Dating Safety
Many dating sites have hundreds of success stories posted online. That being said, I, like most people, would be lead to believe that the dangers of online interaction are certainly there but not any more of a problem than face-to-face social activities. We could not be farther from the truth. I have been a victim of online deceit, fraud and even crime, as thousands of others have. This is occurring everyday, every hour, in chat rooms, personal ads and instant messages. It ranges from something as being as a married man claiming to be single in a chat room to the sexual offender setting up victims with personal ads. But yet, thousands of us are online everyday looking for “the one”. After considering that fact, I have come to the conclusion that most people who seek out online partners have reluctantly accepted the dangers. They assume that the chances are remote they will become victimsâÂ?¦if they are careful. Again, nothing can be farther from the truth and that is why PersonaCheck came into existence.
A few years ago I was talking to a woman who obviously was not new to online interaction and she asked me a simple question that I had no answer for, “Jeff, you seem like a nice guy, but I have talked to a lot of so called nice guys and they all have lied. How do I know you are what and who you say you are”? How could I or anyone answer that question when we are separated by digital space? It was a fair question and one that should be asked by anyone who is serious about who he or she talks to. I know that I am a generally honest individual with good credit, liked by many people and I am kind to my mother, but how do you “prove” that to another online? It took me over six months of pondering that question to come up with the answer and another two years of development to introduce PersonaCheck. But now I can prove who I am in chat rooms, instant messages, personal ads and anywhere I want, online or off. I can do this without danger of identity theft, giving a stalker my address, or having to reveal private information.
To understand the idea behind PersonaCheck you have to look at how other websites look at dating background checks and proving identities online. There are about a half dozen websites devoted to doing background on potential dating partners. There are over sixty websites that promote background checks for employment, apartment rental, and other causes. During the development of PersonaCheck I looked at all of these services. While most of these companies are honestly trying to provide a service usable for specific needs, they all share a common, but extremely major flaw. If an individual wanted to be able to show his or her sincerity, honesty, and character to another (whether online or off), every service out there required private information to be revealed to another person. That woman or man at the other end of the conversation is still an unknown, a stranger and potential criminal.
These sites promoted criminal background checks locally and nationally, and credit reports. All an individual had to provide was certain information about the person being checked, pay a fee and within a few hours to a few days you get your report. Without exception, every background or investigative service I examined required personal information to be revealed including social security number, date of birth, home address, or more to provide a report. This information needed to be provided not by the individual being researched, but the stranger. This brings up an interesting question- In a society where identity theft is a national crisis, where criminal databases are filled with common names, stalkers walk free and our privacy is under attack from all sides, who in their right mind would give out any information to a stranger? Consider the other potential pitfalls of having someone else check you out. If your name is Johnson you already know the pitfalls of a common name. You never committed a crime in your life but there are 300 Johnson’s in the county criminal database. The same goes for national credit reports. If every website involved in background checks for dating or other purposes has the same obvious flaw, how do you “prove” who you are if you are asked to like I was? Up until now you had no answer or exposed yourself to privacy violation. Then there are the “adult ID” types of services. These generally are nothing more than a vehicle to get into adult sites and anyone with access to a credit card can “prove” they are over 18. No reason to get into the basic flaws of that system. They are obvious.
So with all these website services offering essentially nothing of value, what is different about PersonaCheck? The answer is so simple but up until now no one else has seen it. You have the background check done on yourself. You control the information provided to anyone you choose to give it to. You have a third party provide the information from an encrypted secure site and you can provide that information safely to anyone as often as you want.
To understand how PersonaCheck works, let’s take an example of two people interacting online and assume that both are sincerely seeking a relationship. Our member ( we’ll call him Bob) has joined and had the background information process completed. He has approved all the findings and his PersonaCheck profile is ready. Bob has met Mary in a chat room and found a lot in common. In time Bob wants to begin the process to eventually meet in person. This requires trust and confidence. Mary is also talking to Tom, Dick and Harry. While Bob’s competition is an unknown to him, it is also an unknown to Mary. Consider the position Bob will be in if he is able to voluntarily provide a background report from an independent third party customized for Mary. Bob simply goes into his membership profile at PersonaCheck, enters in Mary’s name and email. He also chooses from 13 verified options of information to reveal to Mary. Bob can reveal as much or as little as he chooses. While PersonaCheck never gives out specific details like social security numbers or birth date, it does show such information as verified and gives the option to reveal general information like state of issuance for the social security number and year born.
Bob now can add a personal note, preview his customized profile and send the email directly to Mary. Mary finds the email in her box as being sent from PersonaCheck, not Bob directly. The email has a brief explanation of what PersonaCheck is and a unique link that will open to the specific profile Bob has customized for Mary. The only person the email is intended for is Mary and she can only access it for a limited time. From Bob’s PersonaCheck, Mary can see that Bob has no criminal convictions, his credit is excellent, and the state and city of residence is what Bob has told her plus a lot more. What Bob has really shown is his sincerity and honesty. What proof can Tom Dick or Harry provide about themselves? What do they have that conveys their seriousness about finding a partner? Bob has the upper hand in every interaction online and can use his PersonaCheck membership as often, with anyone, or however he chooses. When Bob places a personal ad he can mention it and even include a photo with the PersonaCheck logo embedded in one corner. He can provide it to apartment rental managers, potential employers, as a letter of reference to online business contacts, any personals site on or off line with total control of his private information.
So many players, marrieds and losers ply their lies onlineâÂ?¦ is it any wonder why the net has gotten the reputation it has? While PersonaCheck is useful for both sexes, I suspect in the long term more men will take advantage of the service. Women tend to need more reassurance online and with good reason. However, my experience has been that men do not have the market cornered on deceit. If and when I actually find Ms. Right out there online, I am going to insist on her joining PersonaCheck. I am tired of getting burned as are a lot of us who seek love, friendship and partners online. If you are serious and want to meet others who are sincere, give yourself the advantage the others don’t have. Right now, I know I have the advantage over youâÂ?¦I am a member of PersonaCheck.com.
