Why I Will Be Happy to Buy a New House: Or All the Things Wrong with My Old One

The kitchen cabinets will close, and stay closed without having to wrap a pony tail holder around the handles.

My laundry room will not also be my hallway.

The hallways will be wide enough we can pass without one of us having to step into the nearest doorway.

I will have a real shower. Not some contraption I came up with that involves PVC pipe and rope.

Cold breezes will be outside and not on my side of the bed or from that window behind the couch.

Rain will stay outside where it belongs.

I am going to buy a new house, not one that someone else has owned and I keep finding their stuff behind appliances and in walls.

I find stuff inside walls because we have to keep replacing them, and the floors, when water soaks through from the flooding hot water heater or the rain. The new house will have new walls that have not soaked up 32 years of ook.

I will not have to do the dishes; the dishwasher will do them for me.

I will have the ability to use all four burners on the stove at the same time without having to search for a lighter.

I will have a closet, not just a pole hung across one end of my bedroom

I will have a guest room and an office, not some odd combination of the two.

Our windows will be new and not so old that someone once told us we probably shouldn’t clean them because the dirt may be all that is holding it together.

Our beautiful land will have a house to match it.

This is why I am happy to buy a new house.